A Field Trip to Avenue Q
by WolfyMagician
Summary: What would happen to Avenue Q if a few fans went there? The residents don't know they're a musical! How exactly will they respond to a group of teens who are total fangirls? Especially if they're in love with certain puppets...Skip to chap 2 when it's up.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Notes: Okay, this is the weirdest Avenue Q fic ever. I'm not really feeling this particular chapter, so yeah. The acutal bothering of Avenue Q characters will be in chapter two or something. I honestly don't like this first chapter, so I will make chapter two understandable even without reading this chapter. Yeah, I'll update soon. If you see the next chapter up, I highly recommend to skip this and read that. For those of you who do wanna read this, here ya go.**

**I own nothing but the odd kiddies.**

_Field Trip to Avenue Q_

"YES!"

A young boy, lying across the newly-vacuumed floor, started, hitting his head on the bottom of the beat-up couch next to him. He turned, rubbing the back of his head, to the source of the ear-splitting noise. "What?"

"YES! Yes, yes, yes!" shouted a girl, literally jumping on her seat. "I GOT IT!"

"Got what?" asked the boy, Grey, looking at his older friend.

"The Avenue Q back-up puppets!" replied the girl excitedly. "These were actually used by the original Broadway cast when the real puppets were being cleaned! And I got it!"

"What?" repeated the boy, lying back down on the floor.

"On eBay," said the girl, finally lowering her voice, "it was selling. A bid by some guy who doesn't want it anymore. I got it for a thousand bucks."

"WHAT?!" bellowed Grey in undertones of shock, sitting up so suddenly that he became momentarily dizzy. "You paid a grand for puppets?"

The girl, J, scoffed. "Not just any puppets. _Avenue Q_ puppets."

When Grey opened his mouth to argue, J added, "All of them. Kate, Princeton, _NICKY_, Rod, Trekkie Monster..._ALL_ of them."

Grey grinned after a moment of silence. "Sweet. I call Trekkie."

"No you don't," snapped J sharply. Atmosphere changing dramatically, she towered over the boy like a wild animal protecting her young ones, "I paid for them with my own money. You know, since I save and not blow everyting I've got off girls..."

Grey rolled his eyes. "Can it."

There was a distant noise of footsteps and, suddenly, two girls entered the room, both looking as though Christmas had come early.

The smaller of the two, Cole, grinned like the Cheshire Cat. "Well, hello, ladies..." she said, looking back and forth between J and Grey. "Don't we have a surprise for you..."

The girl beside her, April, smirked, holding out a few pieces of paper in front of them.

Grey bounced to his feet, running to the paper held out to him by his 'older' sister. Smiling, April raised the papers over her head, out of the boy's reach.

J turned back to her laptop, typing as fast as she could to seal the bid. The nonstop 'click-click-click' sound of the keyboard filled the room, jumping off each wall to punctuate the current silence.

Cole walked over to her friend, looking at the laptop screen that was completely covered in numbers,words, and money signs.  
"Ooh, you won the bid after all..."

J smiled triumphantly, "I know..."

"Y'know, we got front row seats to Avenue Q for tomorrow night..."

"Great. Yeah. I know."

"Okay, then..." Cole rolled her eyes, ignoring J's lack of enthusiasm. She turned to her friends, thoughtfully leaning against the nearest wall. "Wouldn't it be fun to visit Avenue Q? For real?"

April and Grey nodded in unison, "Of course."

J, who had now secured her purchase, looked over to see three kids with the same facial expression. The one that basically shouted: 'DEEP IN THOUGHT'

Still, she too imagined the happiness of finally meeting the adult puppets. Talking with Trekkie about porn, annoying Princeton about never finding his purpose, forcing Rod out of the closet, and, (OMG) going on a date with Nicky. Her face lit up considerably, a blush forming on her cheeks. Nicky! The cutest, jobless, sweetest, laziest green puppet in the whole universe! If she ever met him...well, let's just say Rod would kill her...

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX

"Okay, the subway should be here any minute..."

The four kids sat, fidgeting excitedly, on cracked blue plastic chairs on the filthy subway station. Cole glanced at the battered clock above them. The arrival time of each subway was next to it, behind a peeling plastic cover. Even though the sun wasn't to leave until later, the clouds covered up any chance of light.

'This sucks,' thought Cole, 'I had us leave extra early so we'll be near the theatre before dark...but...'

With a loud noise, a voice in the intercom announced, "Subway to Avenue Q. Please board as quickly as you can."

The kids froze, wildly looking around, the same thought running through each other's head: 'WTF?'

There was a loud hissing noise behind them, the kind the door of a subway makes as it opens. Surprised, they all turned around. They hadn't heard anything after the speakers confused them, let alone an approaching subway. Nevertheless, the kids slowly walked towards their waiting ride, not a single word exchanged between them. When they reached the door, April, who was leading them, stopped suddenly, causing all of them to bump into each other. She looked at Cole with a questioning look on her face. After a moment of slient arguing, not requiring spoken words, the speakers warned that the subway was to leave in one minute. Cole closed her eyes and nodded vigorously to April, giving her the command. Slowly, April walked into the subway, the others following suit. No sooner had they all entered, the subway, with a sudden burst of speed, charged into the everlasting darkness of the underground. The lights went off, and the four teenagers, horrified, huddled close to each other on the cold floor, wishing that the ride would just end.

What did they get themselves into?

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

"!"

BAM!

The subway, thankfully, came to a sudden stop after suddenly going a million miles an hour. The ride took about twenty minutes. At the fifteen minute mark, it was just a blur so fast you would've missed it if you had blinked. It was going well over five-hundred, although that didn't seem possible for anything heavier than...well, nothing. (We're talking about over five-hundred per millisecond, people. O_o)

So, naturally, the stop sent everyone on board flying. Oddly enough, there were only four passengers. No driver. The teens got up after they had calmed down enough (April was about to cry and Grey had already cried). As the lights turned back on in the subway, a voice announced in an official tone through invisible speakers: "We have reached Avenue Q. Please watch your step as you leave. Thank you for riding with us, we hope you will again."

The moment the doors opened, the terrified kids ran out, Grey screaming: "LAND! Oh, land!" He fell to the ground and simply lay on his stomach, trying to embrace the dirty cement floor. April slowly sank to her knees before completely breaking down. The only ones not crying were J and Cole, but they did look thorougly shaken. Cole turned around to find that the subway had disappeared. In fact, the place seemed almost...normal. When they had ran out of the subway, it was completely silent and deserted. Now, the station was filled with people, all going about their daily lives. The air was full of talk and smoke, and everyone didn't seem to notice a subway had just stopped to drop off four hyperventalating kids after shooting through the underground. It wasn't even dark anymore! Yup, the sun was shining beautifully above them. Well, at least they didn't notice the subway. The kids were now getting the attention of some people. Finally, a woman walked over to them.

"Are you children alright?" she asked in a gentle, kind voice. "You look like you four jumped off a plane..."

"That would've been better," croaked J after finding her voice.

"What happened?"

"Uhm..."

"Yes?"

"Well, see--"

"We just missed our ride," interrupted Cole quickly. "We ran trying to catch it on time, but we didn't make it."

"Oh..." the woman said. She smiled, understanding. "Well, I hope you can get on the next stop..."

"Yes, us, too," chuckled Cole. "Thank you for..."

"Oh, don't worry, sweetie. Well, goodbye then. Good luck."

"Thank you. You, too."

As the woman left, Cole relaxed slightly before helping her friends up. A few people had noticed kids were on the ground looking exhausted and as though a ghost just appeared, and she didn't want anymore people asking if they were 'okay'.

"Let's go..." Cole told them quietly, not wanting to be heard.

The other three nodded, following their 'leader'. Cole had always been the one they looked up to; she was the most mature and resembled a parent figure the most among them. In fact, her mind was more grown-up than her body. They all knew the reason she lied to the lady. And to every adult, for that matter. It was because of the number one rule in her book: "Never trust anyone but yourself."

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

"So...anyone got money on them?"

Grey, leaning against a rusty lamp pole, held onto his stomach tightly. "I'm hungry..."

April glanced at him quickly before returning her gaze to Cole, who was currently using the phone booth beside them. "I'll feed you later."

J, trying to flatten out a torn-up, damp map, asked Cole without looking up, "Where _are_ we anyway?"

Cole put the phone down after unsuccessfully trying to use it. "This doesn't even work. It's probably just a prop or something..." She took a phonebook from a cramped space under the phone. Opening it, she began to scan the the first few pages.

"Could you find the nearest pizza place?" asked Grey hopefully, arms still around his rumbling stomach. When he was met with silence, he sighed, closing his eyes with defeat. His stomach would have non of that. It began to growl ferociously, reminding Grey that it needed to be filled, so much until its owner bellowed desperately, "Anything's fine too! I'll even take random stuff on those weird _stands_..."  
In his mind, Grey saw all the kinds of possibilities...pizza...burgers...ice-cream...

Cole looked up, apologetically, at her now-drooling friend.  
'I'll treat them to a buffet later...' she mentally promised herself. Slowly, she returned her attention back to the phone book and continued to study the page she had left on.  
Suddenly, her eyes widened and her mouth opened slightly in awe.

This did not go unnoticed; April, Grey, and J all gathered around their frozen leader and looked at where her eyes were stuck on in the third page of the book. Grey's jaw dropped and April gasped, clasping her hands to her mouth. J, like Cole, just stared at the page in disbelief.

Finally, Cole said, "I don't believe it..."

Grey nodded trance-like, "It's true..."

April mouthed: "O-M-G."

J jumped up and down, hissing, "This has got to be true..."

And, all in unison, the kids cried out: **_"WE'RE IN AVENUE Q!"_**

And this, my friends, is where the fun begins...


	2. Chapter 2

The kids silently walked to where the sign reading "Avenue Q" was standing gloriously. The light seemed to bounce of the pole and onto any onlookers' eyes. As they walked nearer to the sign, it was as if a heavy weight was being lifting from inside each of them. The seriousness. Selflessness. Responsibility. All the things that adults have. Instead, for once in a very long time, they felt what other kids feel each day they are kids: innocence. Wonder. Excitement. Ignorance. All the care-free feelings in each child before their eyes are opened. The good feelings before the truth about life is shown.

When they reached the wonderful, orange sign, they were all smiling. Grinning from ear to ear for no reason. Just happy as kids should. Wow, that feeling was so good to them!

"Yay!" cried April and J, bouncing up and down, giggiling madly.

"This _pwns_!" bellowed Grey, climbing on the pole.

"I know!" Cole jumped up beside Grey, throwing her head back and laughing blissfully.

They were all too busy not caring, joking, and laughing. Laughing themselves silly. But being kids.

Finally.

"Ohemgee!" cried Cole suddenly, pointing at the direction of run-down buildings. "Isn't that where all the people live?! Rod, Nicky, Trekkie, Kate, Princeton--"

"Oh my gosh it's _Gary Coleman_!" gasped J, staring at a figure jogging towards them. Grey and Cole hopped off the pole and April ran beside them, blushing furiously.

"What the hell are you guys making so much noise for, eh?" panted Gary when he reached the kids. He took a quick look at each of them before saying, "Where are your mamas?"

"Uhm," mumbled Cole embarassedly, "they're not here. My parents are abroad." She then ran and hugged Gary, also blushing. The other two girls followed suit, except Grey, of course.

"What the hell?!" shouted Gary as a three giggling fan-girls jumped on him. "H-hey! Hold on a--"

"Oh my gosh, I love your songs! 'Schadenfreude' is my favorite! Wow you--"

"--I loved 'You Can Be as Loud as the Hell You Want'! That was so--"

"--I liked how you said 'Yes, I am' when that newcomer came and--"

"--oh and your dance moves are epic! I mean, I just--"

"--I love your outfit! The stripes look--"

"--you're voice sounded like a girl's, but aren't you played by a girl? That's weird--"

"OKAY!" bellowed Gary over the girls' voices. "Okay, I have no idea how you knew any of that, but I'll let that slide since you all seem to be current-Gary-Coleman fans."

"Oh, we are!" announced April happily, "I love you!" Her eyes opened wide when she realized what she had just said, but Gary grinned at her and she blushed scarlet.

Smirking at his sister, Grey said, "So...where is everyone else?"

"Oh, yeah, I wanna see Rod and Nicky!" J exclaimed enthusiastically, bouncing on the balls of her feet.

"Is there an apartment we can stay in?" asked Cole, taking out her wallet at the sudden idea, "We'll take whatever's available..."

"Oh, yes," Gary replied, looking at a piece of paper with names and numbers that he had taken out of his pocket, "Some residents just moved, so that spot'll be available..."

"Oh, Brian and Christmas Eve? Aw, they're not here anymore?" wondered J, slightly put off. When Gary shook his head she added, "Okay, we'll take it then."

"Do you guys have jobs?" Gary questioned disbelievingly, "What are ya, fourteen? Fifteen?"

"How didja know?" demanded Grey, frowning. Gary shrugged.

"I have money saved up," Cole assured him, "my parents are pretty loaded, and I get a lot a week when they send money from overseas."

"Alright, then. Follow me this way to your new apartment in Avenue Q."

XxXxxXxxxXxxx

"Hey, Gary, I need to check our mailbox one last time." Brian casually walked up to them, hands in his pockets, smiling.

"It's Brian! Are you wearing underwear today?!" blurted Grey, amused.

"Huh?" Brian looked confused as the teens surrounded him.

"Woah, you're bigger up close!" commented J, looking up at him on her tip-toes.

"I think that's an extremely awesome shirt!" April added, also on the balls of her feet.

"I love your singing voice! 'There is Life Outside Your Apartment' is classic!" Cole finished for all of them.

"Can we have your autograph?" begged J, clinging onto Brian's arm. They had said all of this in one breath.

Brian just stared, mouth slightly agape, before chuckling. "Sure. Can't say no to a few fans..."

"Woah, woah, do you guys not want Gary Coleman's autograph?" an annoyed Gary demanded. When the teens clung onto him, assuring they wanted his autograph as well, he pulled some pre-signed photos from his pocket.

As Brian, Gary, April, Cole, J, and Grey all began to laugh and talk and mess around, Gary couldn't help but wonder whether things will ever be the same again.

_Eh, probably not._

* * *

**_Author's Notes: Randomist fic ever. Yeah, I like this better than chapter 1. Next chapter will either be Kate and Princeton or Nicky and Rod. Please review!_**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

"...so, anyway, I said that I'd sue them if they don't back off..." Gary finished dramatically, nodding his head. The fan-girls surrounding him (with mouths slightly open) also nodded absentmindedly, taking in every word.

"Gary, when you're done telling those kids how exactly you managed to sue your _parents_, would you please open the mailbox? I have to get home soon..." Brian frowned, leaning against the brick wall that he had been pushed into earlier. Gary rolled his eyes and got up. Walking over to the mailboxes beside Brian, he pulled out a handful of keys, eyeing each one carefully, before extracting a particularly rusted one. He tossed it to Brian, who barely caught it.

"So...you kids gonna get this apartment?" asked Gary, nodding to the beat-up **'FOR RENT'** sign beside him. Cole nodded distractedly, staring at a particularly bright window above her. "Oh, I wouldn't worry about _him_," Gary said, catching the girl's gaze, "He just sits up there and looks at, erm, _'stuff'_online."

"Yeah..." Cole muttered, so softly that no one could hear her.

"Well, let's check out this thing!" Gary exclaimed, opening the door to the empty apartment. Cole finally looked away and followed the former-star into the darkness beyond the doorway, her friends walking in sync behind her.

**XxXxXxXxXxxx**

"Morning, Brian."

"Oh, hey, Kate Monster..."

"How's life?"

"Disappointing."

"What's the matter?"

"The catering company- oh, wait. I told you that already, huh?"

"Yup!"

"Okay, then, I'm just about to head home. Y'know, Christmas Eve won't like it if I come home late again..."

"Cute! You have the whole newly-married couple thing going on! I'm so happy for you!"

"Heh," Brian smiled, scratching the back of his neck, embarrassed. "How's the not-single life for you? Is Princeton keeping up?"

"Oh, yes, yes," Kate replied, positively beaming, "he's wonderful! I couldn't ask for a better boyfriend."

Brian smiled at her. _Well_, he thought, _least I know Princeton's doing fine_. "Oh, yeah, you'll be getting new neighbors."

"Huh?" Kate asked, confused. "What new neighbors?"

"They're takin' our old apartment. Since we moved, remember? Right next to Trekkie."

"Oh, yeah..." The monster was momentarily shocked. She wasn't expecting Gary to have found new residents so quickly. And right after Princeton had just moved in as well. "Are they nice?"

"Cool enough," Brian replied, chuckling again. "Heh, they might ask for your autograph, though."

"What?"

"They asked for mine. And Gary's."

_**"GARY'S?"**_

"I know, huh."

"Why?" demanded Kate, once more confused. _Damn,_ she hated that feeling.

"Heh, I honestly have no idea. I think they might have been stalking us," Brian added, frowning, "I mean, how else did they know all the songs I sang? And what I did?"

"They knew all the songs you sang? What the hell?"

"And they-oh, speak of the devil..."

The door to their far left had suddenly opened and Gary, followed by the weird teens, emerged, looking very smug indeed.

But then-

"OMFG, it's _Kate MONSTER_!"

Running by Gary and Brian, the fans shot towards the furthermore-confused Kate, eyes as round as coins.

True to Brian's word, there were several voice calling "Can I have your autograph?" at once. However, there were also "Can we take pictures together?" and "Wow, you're so furry!" and "You have a pretty singing voice!"

All in one breath.

"W-wha-?" Kate gasped, backing away to the wall. She felt more confused than the time Trekkie Monster had tried to explain the real uses of the Internet.

"Please?" came four whining voices.

"Just do it," muttered Brian, barely moving his lips, "it'll be over soon enough."

Somewhat reluctantly, Kate signed different sheets of paper, nodding and smiling at the compliments she recieved as she did so. In the end, she felt very confident about herself. She had never heard so much good things about her! And from _other _people, too. She was starting to get attached to the weird kids until Princeton came back.

And that's when it went downhill.

As her boyfriend walked to the street they were on, Brian called Princeton over and all the girls turned around and stared. At first, Kate didn't mind. After all, she was sure they were just stunned to see another one of their idols. When they ran and threw themselves onto him, almost knocking him over, she was a little uncomfortable. When they yelled "I love you, Princeton!" and kissed him on the cheek several times, yeah, she was pissed.

_"Hands off my boyfriend!" _she shrieked menacingly. However, only Brian heard her. He laughed.

Princeton looked at the weird girls, confused. Brian called his name once more, and he turned to stare him. Without any shame, Brian gave his friends instructions, telling him to sign whatever were shoved under his orange nose and just smile and nod at any compliments. After a few confusing (and very awkward) moments, Princeton loosened up and played along with the whole 'Broadway star' thing. After all, it was nice to be admired by someone. And sign their arms with orange markers.

Kate, who was still glowering at the girls, gave a very annoyed hiss. "Damn them."

"Don't worry, Kate. I still love you." Grey stood, unnoticed, beside the monster, looking disgusted at Princeton surrounded by his group. "Why does he get all that attention anyway?"

"I'm guessing you like one of them?"

"No, _duh_."

"J?"

"Cole."

"Oh. That's cute."

Brian was still laughing at the weirdness of it all. He watched Princeton surrounded by fangirls, all very taken with him, listened to Kate and Grey talking jealously and shooting disgruntled looks at them, and found Gary who had mysteriously appeared. It was much crazier than usual.

Maybe things would never be the same after all.

"Welcome to Avenue Q..."

* * *

**Author's Notes: Hey, guys. I'm sorry for the wait. I was so sure this story sucked that I stopped writing. Then I got reviews and decided to write a bit more. Well, that's it for now. I'm off to brain-storm ideas on the fangirlyness shown to Rod and Nicky! Oh, yeah, these guys (maybe not as much Grey) support RodXNicky! Weee! Guess what that does when you meet the people you base Yaoi stories on. Hahaha. Please review and tell me what you might want to see. **


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

"If you were gay, that'd be okay. I mean 'cause hey, I like you anyway!"

"And if it were me—"

"Okay! We get it, you like Rod and Nicky..."

Brian rubbed his temples in annoyance, having spent three hours with loud fans. Who were these guys anyway, knowing everything about the avenue?

"Hey, where's Rod and Nicky?" questioned Cole, literally bouncing up and down on the balls of her feet.

"Yeah, yeah, I wanna see how obviously gay Rod is!" J exclaimed brightly. Everybody turned around to stare at her, eyebrows raised. Laughing nervously, she added, "I'm curious."

"Oh, Rod's at work and Nicky's probably drunk and already passed out on the damn couch," Gary said dismissively, shaking his head.

"That sounds promising," April mused, glancing at an apartment window on the upstairs floor.

"Can we see him? Please? Pretty please?" J pulled on Gary's sleeve, making sincere, puppy-dog eyes.

"Oh, those don't work on me. Ya think I fell for that when I sued the 'rents? No thank you!"

_"Pleeaaaasssssee!_ Nicky's my favorite!"

"I thought Trekkie was," Cole stated with a slight grin. Could it be? She would finally be able to have the orange monster for herself, without the annoying-ness of J?

"Ah...well, he's all yours now. There is no way I am giving up a chance to be with Nicky!"

"You better watch it, Rod already has him," April reminded, still watching Gary Coleman out of the corner of her eye. Damn, he looked so cool to her.

"Oh, crap! I _so _forgot! He's already taken!"

"Taken?" repeated Brian, who still had not left as he was supposed to. "What d'ya mean _'taken'_?"

"Oh, y'know, by Rod," J giggled. "_Him and Rod_."

Gary almost choked on...well, air? Eh, he just choked in his words. "Sorry, but _what the hell're you talkin' about? _Rod and Nicky?"_  
_  
"Yeah! _O-M-G_, you've _never_ heard 'Fantasies Come True?" All girls made a collective gasp, scandalized.

"Uh...no. Brian?" The Super looked at his friend, an eyebrow raised. Brian shook his head.

"I-I—oh, I don't believe this..." J began to fan herself with her hands, shaking her head in disbelief.

"Nobody's heard of the sweetest song on Avenue Q to date?" Cole almost hissed. _How dare they?_ **"No one?"**

"Uhm...I, uh, have to go now," Brian laughed pathetically. He did_ not_ like the looks of this. "I think—er—my wife's expecting me to, uhm, be home by now..."

_**"WHAT KIND OF MONSTERS ARE YOU?"**_ screamed J and Cole at the same time. If Grey, who had been patiently listening to the exchange all this time, closed his eyes, he could've sworn he just went to hell. J and Cole mad about something concerning Avenue Q and "Fantasies Come True" was something he could go without ever experiencing, thank you very much.

"Guys, calm down," he tried saying coolly, despite the way he flinched when two pairs of maniacal, red eyes latched onto him.

"Shut up, you," J warned, pointing a finger at him.

"Bye!" squealed Brian after sensing bloodshed.

"Enough of this crap. _April, J_." Cole snapped her fingers, pointing menacingly at a fleeing Brian and Gary. True enough, just like a gang movie, the two men were captured, tied up together by ropes that just _happened_ to be there, and forcibly sat on the cement steps beside them.

**"J!"**

With one, swift motion, J pulled out her cell phone and set the volume on maximum.

"April?" she whispered in a deadly voice.

Nodding, April took out her own phone and hit speed-dial. It was silent for a few moments, only the sounds of Gary and Brian's heavy breathing. The atmosphere was very tense.

Then—

(soft snoring)

_*It sure can get lonely at night  
Nicky, you awake?  
Ah, is that a Unicorn?  
Ugh, he's talking in his sleep again  
No, I'll wear the purple shoes...who painted the kitten?  
Ugh, maybe I should just shake him  
I love you, Rod_ **(cue the swooning)  
**_What did you say?  
I love your little laugh  
Nicky? Are you awake?  
Take off your shirt_ **("Kyaa!")**  
_Oh Nicholas!  
Have you been shy all this time?  
Have we been hiding from each other? I wonder*_

Brian and Gary's eyes literally widened as round as plates. _What the hell?_

_All those nights, I'd lay in bed  
Thoughts of you, running through my head  
_  
_*I know, put my earmuffs on the cookie*_  
_  
But I never thought the things in my head  
Could really happen in my bed_ **("Kyaaaaaa!")**

_*You look like David Hasselhoff*_

_All those years, I missed the signs  
Couldn't read between the lines  
Who'd have thought I would see the day?  
Where I'd hear you say, what I heard you say_

By now, a trio of swooning teenagers, amidst their tears, began to sing along with utmost passion, and somewhat off-key and screaming. It hurt, yes, but at least they were emotional about it.

_And now I find what was always in my mind  
Was in your mind too, who knew?  
Fantasies come true_

_And now I see, that what I always dreamed of  
Was meant to be you and me, me and you  
Fantasies come true_

At the instrumental break, they danced, tying to relive the scene they had memorized from the actual musical. However, J was playing as Rod and Cole was Nicky, with April just swaying to the music.

_You and me lived in fantasy, but soon we'll be a reality _

(The dancing and singing was now so intense, Grey stepped up onto the steps Brian and Gary were on to save himself.)

_'Cuz now, 'cuz now  
My love, my love  
I'm getting what I've always been dreaming of  
So are you, oh baby  
Fantasies come true_

And now, and now  
I swear, I swear that  
When you want me I'm gonna be right there  
To care, to care for you  
That's what I'm gonna do  
And make your fantasies  
Fantasies come true

Fantasies come true

*Uh, hey Rod, buddy, you're talking in your sleep  
Oh, I thought you were talking in your sleep  
No, I just came to bed  
Heh, you're dreamin' is all  
Oh  
Sounded like a nice dream, though  
Yes, it was a nice dream  
Well, goodnight  
Goodnight, Nicky*

With that, J, Cole, and April burst into tears, holding each other.

"Wah! Oh, stop-stop, April! Hang up! _HANG UP_!" J was in hysterics, holding her vibrating phone as though it were a priceless diamond that could not be let go. She was banging her fist on the ground, sobbing pitifully.

"And how in _the hell_ did you manage to get your phone to ring for three minutes?" asked Gary after initially being too shocked to speak.

"I-I fixed it," sniffed J.

"It's actually shorter 'cuz she cut out Kate and Princeton's part." Cole blew her nose in a tissue Grey had given her. Sensing his chance to get ahead of Princeton, he opened his arms.

"Need a hug?" Never underestimate the way girls cry over Muppet love songs.

"Oh! Thanks!" Cole threw herself into her friend, sobbing and mumbling. Grey thought he heard "I can't believe that he loves him" and "why don't they just get together" and "Nicky is so clueless!"

Ah, well, girls will be girls.

"Wait, wait, wait..._Kate and Princeton _sang, too?" Brian struggled to get in a more comfortable position, but hey, if you were tightly bound next to a washed-up child-star on pretty damning hard rock, you'd have trouble trying to sit easily, too.

"Y-yes, but _KATE_ got a HAPPY ENDING!" All of a sudden, J's tears vanished and were replaced by a power-hungry look. "I don't see Rod and Nicky hooking up at the end! They didn't get their fairy tale ending, now did they? **_I don't support RodXRicky!"_**

To make her somewhat inappropriate point, J showed off her cell phone's wallpaper, the picture being Rod and Nicky in each other's embrace with Ricky crying in a corner.

"What the hell?" demanded Gary.

"Exactly! What the HELL was Rod doing with Ricky? What the HELL did Nicky want from makin' the retard personal ad for Rod? Why, I even—"

"Excuse me, Gary, could you please keep your voice down? I'm trying rest, you see."

The voice floated down from somewhere above them and, as the fanatics and residents looked up, a certain blue-faced investment banker caught their eye.

He, of course, regretted even showing himself the moment one of the girls fainted and two others began desperately trying to climb the brick wall to reach his window. Damn the second floor for not being too high up.

**"ROD!"  
**  
"RODDY-BOY! I'm coming!"

In just a few confusing seconds, Rod was tackled to the ground, a young girl on top of him. He felt the other on his legs.

"_Kyaa!_ We're so your biggest fans! **O-M-G, O-M-G,** you look so epic!"

"How do you get your hair so soft and fluffy like that?"

"I voted no on Prop 8, just sayin'!"

"Gay people are amazing, y'know? If you want, I'll help you out of that closet step-by-step!"

Then, standing out from all the high-pitched 'squees' came a deeper, familiar voice.

"Wha's goin' on, Rod buddy?...You didn't say you had girlfriends..."

**_"NICKY!"_** Rod screamed.

* * *

**Author's Notes: Yay! An update! (does jig) So, I apologize for my lack of...updating. I saw that I last added chapter 3 way long ago, so I decided to do chapter 4! **

**Rod and Nicky will be heavy in the next one, so cross your fingers that I'll have the time!**

**Thanks for the reviews! They mean a lot to me! **

**(P.S. Sorry for any mistakes or errors. I obviously don't own Avenue Q or Gary Coleman...=_=)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

"So...uh, are these your exes from high school that I don't know about? 'Cuz, dude, they look so freakin' _young_..."

"Nicky! These two are _not_ my old girlfriends..." Rod managed to push the teenagers off, frowning. "I thought you knew I never had a girlfriend before!"

"Well, I was curious," replied Nicky, still examining the young girls. "How old're you two?"

J and Cole sprung up, squealing. _Did Nicky just talk to them?_

"Too young for you, that's for sure," snapped Rod sharply.

"Fine, fine. Geez, cut me some slack, man, I haven't been in a decent relationship in a while..."

"Oh!" giggled J, reddening slightly, "I wouldn't mind being in a relationship with you, _Nickykins_!"

"Heh. Cute, but unless you're eighteen, I'd rather not take the chance."

"Damn! A few more years then!"

"I'll call you then, yeah?"

_"Nicky!"_ reprimanded Rod in a warning tone.

"I'm just kidding. Sheesh, PMS-ing, buddy?"

"If it's an excuse to hit you, I'd gladly take it!"

"You just wanna be a _girl_..."

_**"EXCUSE ME?"**_

"**KIDDING!** Hey, don't give that look! It's creepy!"

"_OHEEMGEE_, you two sound like a married couple!" Cole cut in, throwing her arms around both men. "We should really take a group picture! Y'know, to remember the day when you two realize you're meant to be!"

_"What?"_ Nicky and Rod exclaimed, startled, momentarily forgetting their squabble.

"You're love for each other!" J helpfully added, pulling out her **"RODxNICKY 4EVER"** badge. "I'm co-president in this club with Cole!"

"Why...is there a picture of me and Rod _kissing_?" Nicky suddenly questioned, motioning to the large image that basically covered the whole badge. "I don't remember doing _that_ at all. Wait, was I drunk...?"

"Ooh! It's fanart! Don't you love it? It took me and Cole ages to Photoshop it!"

"Fanart?"

"Yes! _Art made by fans_! I happen to have _four-hundred-and-twenty-eight_ copies of Avenue Q related sketches!" J punched the air in emphasis. "That's more work than I do in school!"

"Oh, don't do that, sweetie!" Rod spoke up for the first time after being thrown off-guard by the mention of _loving_ Nicky. "School is _extremely_ important; do you know what kinds of careers are available to very successful people?"

"See, you just want a reason to point out I don't have a job! You gotta be sneakier than that, ol' Roddy-boy!" Nicky huffed indignantly, pointing an accusing finger at his roommate.

Sensing another fight coming up, the two girls quickly asked in unison, "Will you give us your autographs?"

Down below, precisely outside where the "Fantasies Come True" montage had happened, Grey casually chatted with April, every now and then getting comments from the tied-up men and a certain orange college grad who had recently decided to join them. Gary, after flipping an amused Princeton off for not helping, suddenly began ranting about "_not being given a second chance"_ and _"stupid show with the 'Gary Coleman Grills'"._

Since April broke off all conversation with her brother to listen to her idol's monologue, Grey turned to Princeton. "So what's up with you? Find your purpose yet?"

"Huh? Wait, what kind of question is that? Oh my God, do you _know_? Is it obvious? Will I make it big? Money? Fame? A _musical_? What?" The older man's eyes lit up almost instantly as energy simply radiated from his body. (Seriously. His outline seemed to be _shining_.) He grabbed Grey by his shoulders and shook him meaningfully. "Well?"

"Woah, woah! Calm down, dude! I don't know anythin'!" Grey's eyes spun rapidly as he was shaken, making his head ache with dizziness

"Oh." Disappointed, Princeton pulled his arms back and allowed then to fall limply at his sides. "Damn. Thought you knew..."

"Sorry, man. Maybe your purpose...well, you need an idea first! I know just the thing!" The young boy happily pulled out his cell phone and pressed the 'MP3' button. "This is my favorite song, so naturally I have the karaoke version of it!"

(**A/N:** _Grey_, **Princeton**, **_both_**.**)**

At the small, bell-like twinkle, he began:

_Purpose._  
_It's that little flame_  
_That lights a fire_  
_Under your ass._  
_Ha!_  
_Purpose._  
_It keeps you going strong_  
_Like a car with a full_  
_Tank of gas._

Princeton's eyes boggled as he heard his song, but otherwise he kept silent. Hey, the kid didn't sound half bad.

_Everyone else has a purpose,_  
_So what's mine?_

_Oh look._  
_Here's a penny._  
_It's from the year I was born._

_It's a sign!_

_Ha! Ba ba ba ba doo doo doo doo doo._

_I don't know how I know,_  
_But I'm gonna find my purpose._  
_I don't know where I'm gonna look,_  
_But I'm gonna find my purpose._

Laughing, the orange man joined in.

**_Gotta find out._**  
**_Don't wanna wait._**  
**_Got to make sure that my life will be great._**  
**_Gotta find my purpose._**  
**_Before it's too late._**

Grey then picked up the lines of the background singers as he let Princeton continue the song.

_He's gonna find his purpose._

(Princeton, now.)  
**Whoa ooh oh.**

**I'm **_[He's] **gonna find**_ **my **_[his] **purpose.**_

_He's gonna find his purpose._

**Yeaaah yeah yeah!**

**I'm****_ gonna find_ my **[his]_** purpose.**_

**Could be far.**  
**Could be near.**  
**Could take a week**  
**A month**  
**A year**  
**At a job.**  
**Or smoking grass.**  
**Ha!**  
**Maybe at a pottery class.**  
**Could it be?**  
**Yes it could.**  
**Something's coming.**  
**Something good.**

**I'm gonna find my purpose.**  
**Yeah.**

You're gonna find your purpose.

**Whoa ooh oh.**  
**I'm gonna find it!**

**What will it be? Where will it be?**  
**My purpose in life is a mystery.**  
**Gotta find my purpose.**  
**Gotta find me.**

_You're gonna find your purpose._

**Whoa ooh oh.**  
**I'm gonna find my purpose.**

_You're gonna find your purpose._

**Purpose-purpose-purpose**  
**Yeah yeah.**  
**I gotta find me!**

* * *

"Okay, okay, sign _here_."

"Sweetheart, there is not enough space!"

"Please, Rod? Even your initials are fine! Just—just put _'hey, there, J, I love your pin! I support me and Nicky, too!'_ somewhere! Pleeaaaseee?"

"Ugh. Fine, but not on your shoulder (and I'm writing something else!) Hmm...would it be okay on your forearm?"

"No way, Rod-buddy! I wrote a helluffa lot on there and you are NOT putting some boring crap next to my awesomely fun sig!" Nicky stuck his tongue out from his position next to Cole, signing her entire left arm. Rod rolled his eyes and began writing as small as he could on the tiny area of pen-free skin by J's forearm.

"I am SO glad you guys are doing this," J babbled excitedly, her face (also with several signatures either reading 'Rod' or 'Nicky' on her forehead, cheeks, and jaw) radiating with such enthusiasm that not even Rod dared to spoil.

"Just...wash this all off when you finish taking a picture, alright? We don't want your perfect skin ruined by permanent markers, do we?" The blue man sighed, pushing his slipping glasses back up the bridge of his nose.

"MY GOD! You said my skin is perfect? Holy crap, I've been blessed! May everyone remember the day Rod from Avenue Q, my most _favorite_ homosexual, told me my skin was perfect..." J swooned, closing her eyes dramatically.

"PICTURE TIME!"

So, for literally the thousandth time, Cole began snapping shots at every single person in the room, the flash blinding the two men.

As she and her friend happily positioned him and Nicky next to each other (in what suspiciously seemed like couple poses) and with Nicky's green arm around him, Rod was unable to hold a grin.

"Maybe this won't be so bad after all..."

* * *

**A/N: I wanted this to be soley a Rod and Nicky chapter, but another idea came to mind which I will use in the next one. For all the RickyXRod shippers, I doubt you'll enjoy chapter 6, so...fair warning! **

**As for the 'Purpose' moment, I guess I just felt like having Princeton sing...heheheh.**

**I'm sorry for not updating, but since it's summer, I should have plenty of time! **

**Thanks for reading my failness so far!**

**Disclaimer: I do NOT own Avenue Q, any songs/characters I've used, or the awesomness of Rod and Nicky! They deserve all the credit! **

**Ahem, I do own my fangirls and the boy...hahaha.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

"Seriously, Princeton, just untie us already! Look, the kids ain't gonna care!" Gary yelled angrily, trashing about even with rope tying him securely to Brian. "The hell's wrong with you?"

"Nothing," snickered the orange man, all-too-casually leaning against the railing of the small steps to the apartment complex. "But why should I undo those nice, tight knots? I mean, those girls probably spent a lot of time and effort just roping you two up, huh?"

"Screw you!"

"No, thanks."

"You little son of a—"

"Hey, guys, what's all this fuss about?" called out Grey from the opposite side of the street. He had decided to keep an eye out for Trekkie Monster from a distance because it was fairly difficult to constantly crane his neck just so he could see if the "awesome pervert" glanced out the shutters of his window. But in his current position, he could easily see Trekkie's window and keep an eye on Brian and Gary. Why Cole insisted they had to remain tied up was beyond him...

"Grey, tell Princeton here to untie us!" shouted the former child star as he attempted to kick the college grad "where it hurts".

"Please? I really gotta head home soon," added Brian tiredly, sore from sitting on concrete for such a long time. "My wife's gonna be really pissed."

"Christmas Eve?" Grey grinned, recalling how Cole had memorized the wedding scene from the musical, including Rod's 'My Girlfriend Who Lives in Canada.'

"You know her?"

"Eh, the same way we all know you guys!"

"So like stalkers?" interrupted Princeton happily, hurrying across the street to get to the young teenager. Behind him, Gary began swearing.

"_Hell_ no. We don't stalk, let's get that clear. No, no, we observe and happen to be in the same place at the same time, and that is _not_ stalking!" Grey puffed his chest out defiantly and glared at what supposedly was Trekkie's window.

"Uh-huh. So...watcha think of Lucy...?"

* * *

"If you were gay~!"

"Na-na-na, na-na-na—!"

"That'd be okay~!"

"Nunununu-na-na-na!"

"I mean cuz, hey! Ha!"

"I like you _ANYWAY_!"

"Nicky, how _dare_ you teach a young girl that song!" reprimanded Rod furiously, his face turning a dark shade of purple. "Hell, it's already wrong two under-aged teenagers are in our apartment! _Us!_ Two total strangers!"

"Woah, calm down, Rod! I didn't even know she knew my song! She just started humming the tune!"

"Then how the hell was there_ music_ playing?"

"Ooh!" J threw her hand up brightly, not unlike the way an enthusiastic student might to offer their answer to a teacher. "It's my mp3! I totally have the karaoke versions of all Avenue Q songs on my phone!"

While an interested Nicky chatted J up, Rod was tapped from behind. Startled slightly, he whipped around to come face-to-face with a serious looking Cole. "Is something wrong, sweetie?" he asked in a concerned voice.

"No, no. I—I was wondering if you have a phone..."

"Oh, of course! Of course..." Grinning, he led her over to the small kitchen and handed her the wireless phone on the tiny island. As an afterthought, he pulled out the local phonebook ("Avenue A-Z!") from the shelf above the refrigerator.

"Ooh, thanks! You totally read my mind!" Cole beamed, accepting both items.

"Well, I just assumed you'd want to call someone to pick you up..." Rod admitted with a small smile.

"Oh, no! We live downstairs! Trekkie is one above us!"

"Y-you moved in? When?" _Daaang_. Gary sure knew how to fill up apartments quickly. Maybe he deserved more credit than they gave him.

"Just today! Pretty sweet, huh?"

"H-how old are you?"

"Under eighteen is all I can say!" All smiles, Cole scurried off farther away and busied herself with the items Rod had given her.

He didn't think too much of it though; no, he figured that the child probably just wanted privacy, and he could very well relate to that.

Unfortunately, the other two could not.

"So what should it matter to me what you _DO IN BED WITH GUYS_!"

"Nicky! J! Stop this instant!"

"OHEMGEE, YOU REMEMBERED MY NAME!"

_**"IF YOU WERE GAY—!"**_

"NICHOLAS!"

And so their fighting continued.

Somewhere on the other side of the room, Cole was speaking in hushed whispers with the person on the other end of the line. "Just be here as soon as you can!" she spoke, attempting to sound like a male. "I don't care—uh-huh—wait, damn it! I freakin' mean now!"

She didn't wait for a response.

Smirking triumphantly, she hit the 'end' button.

* * *

_"Rod, mewling now, carefully stared into the eyes of his lover. Could it be? That after all those years of pining and moping, he'd finally get the chance to be with the love of his life? The reason for his existence?_

_"A green hand slowly cupped his cheek and brushed away the tears he had not realized he was shedding. His fantasies were really about to come true! With a small laugh, Nicky leaned in close and whispered those three, little words that his best friend had desired for so long to hear:_

_"I love—"_

"W-wait! Stop this instant!" a blushing Rod almost shrieked, pushing himself up from the couch. "What exactly are you going on about?"

With an innocent shrug, J answered readily, "Fanfiction."

"Excuse me?"

"Fanfiction. I wrote that particular one right after we saw your musical!"

"You—what—?"

"Hey, is the ending naughty?" interrupted Nicky mischievously, watching as his best friend flushed for the hundredth time that day.

Before Rod could come up with an embarrassed, reproachful comment that probably would have made them all laugh, J shook her head and sighed. "No. Cole doesn't think I should be writing that kind of fics."

"Yeah," said-girl affirmed, nodding her head. "She has no clue how..._it_...goes."

"True. But hey, if you want kinky stuff, ask April. She writes the best kinds of 'M' stories ever!"

Nicky snickered, running a hand through his already-messy hair. He personally had no idea what had been said and done the whole day, but frankly, as long as Rod was just as confused, he could care less.

It was the most fun he'd had in a while after all!

It took thirty minutes of arguing about Grey's unusual talent for writing "freakin' amazing one-shots" (Nicky was eating chips while Rod checked his e-mails) before the doorbell rang. Somewhat relieved, the investment banker shut his laptop closed before rising—that is, of course, until Cole dashed for the door herself.

When she opened it, a tall, muscular (and very familiar) green man let himself in with a huff. "The hell you callin' me over for, Nick?" he called into the apartment, ignoring Cole's death glare.

"R-Ricky?" gasped Rod, frozen in his spot standing by the coffee-table. He nervously stared at his ex-boyfriend. "Why are you here?"

With a shrug, he sat himself on the couch next to Nicky, slapping the chips from his hands. "This ass over here said he needed to tell me something."

"Aww. You spilled my food!"

"Shut the hell up. What do you want me here for? To take_ him_ back?" He jerked his head towards a very distressed Rod's direction.

_"Hell no!"_ yelled J and Cole angrily, both sets of eyes glowing bright red. (If Grey had been there, he would have visualized both girls with flames behind them. Just like in real hell.)

Ricky eyed them warily.

Okay, first, he already had to put up with Rod's constant anal tendencies, and inevitably, the denial that he was in love with his clueless roommate. (And to him, this made no sense as Ricky felt that he was a _pretty awesome guy_ who could get _anyone_ he wanted. But nooo, Rod had to go and become distracted over the same guy mooching off him for the past decade or so, leaving him to feel like second best. And ohoho, Ricky _refused_ to be second best.) Besides, that jobless moron was ignorant enough to be completely aware of his own wavering sexual preference! But now this…two young chicks? What were these guys sinking to? _Pedophilia?_

He sighed, turning back to the main source of his agitation. "I'm not interested."

"Screw you! Rod wouldn't ask for you back if you had a gun to his head!"

"Yeah, and Nicky could totally beat the crap out of you! You—you jerk!" J mentally kicked herself for her lack of swear words.

"Nicky is just a pile of crap," replied Ricky coolly, crossing his muscular arms.

Even with an excessive amount of muscles, getting tackled by two teenaged fangirls had clearly never crossed his mind. So when they did just that, yelling out battle cries ("RodXNicky _**FOREVER**_!") and vows of revenge, Ricky was completely overpowered and he hit the ground with a huge _THUD._

The two roommates allowed the girls about three-and-a-half minutes (that half counted _a lot_) before pulling them up. It took more effort to restrain them since they were flailing and kicking.

As far as Ricky went, he looked just about as broken as he would if mugged—bruises, scratches, bite marks...Cole even managed to write **"ROD AND NICKY LOVE"** on his forehead with permanent marker.

He laid there, dazed and out of breath, before sitting up and gazing blankly ahead.

"Is he okay?" muttered Rod nervously, holding J by her shoulders. "What did you do to him?"

"Not enough," spat Cole in disgust, struggling against Nicky's hold of her arms. Normally this would excite her to no end (provoking a series of squeals and "Kyaaa!"s) but now, all that mattered was for Ricky not to leave the building without officially admitting in a very public matter that he indeed did not deserve Rod and was an avid Rod-slash-Nicky supporter himself.

"Hahahah. You look screwed up, dude," chuckled Nicky appreciatively, nodding as though he wanted to emphasize just how much he approved of this situation. "Maybe we shoulda let them have more fun, Roddy."

"Nicholas, don't you_ dare_ encourage this type of behavior!" The blue-skinned man threw a sharp glare at his long-time roommate's direction as the latter's grip on the struggling girl slackened. Before he could open his mouth to angrily point that fact out, Cole had already broken free and made a dash for the beaten Ricky.

A Ricky who was still out of it and sitting, completely vulnerable, on the floor.

He didn't even see the homicidal teenager preparing to pounce on him, intent on introducing him—and specifically his _crotch_—to whole new levels of pain.

Well...

"Sucks to be YOU, asshole!"

* * *

**A/N: *Le gasp!* I updated? Whaaaa?**

**Yes, I did not forget this fic. Though it has been over half a year, I haven't really given up on it. But I cannot promise quick updating and stuff like that...so, I apologize.**

**Hey, thanks if you're still reading this! I'm sure some of you gave up on it, and frankly, I can't blame you. Hahahaha, Yes...**

**I don't really like Ricky. Even though it's canon. *Sigh***

**RodXNicky for life! XP**


End file.
